Saturday, March 24, 2007

Like To Do Just Like The Rest, I Like My Sugar Sweet

One thing that amazes me about Kimberly is her ability to make a commitment.


When she decides to do something or become something, it will be done, no matter what. I am much more willing to change my mind when the going gets tough.

I like to keep my options open, step back and reassess my decisions.

Actually, I am a quitter.

Help me out here people, aren't most of us like that?

For example, I like golf...a lot. At this stage of my existence, I can play all I want. But there have been times when I am standing on the first tee and the wind kicks up a little too much. I simply leave and go home. I will play another time when it is not windy. There is golf to watch on TV, after all.

Kimberly has been committed to yoga for 12 years. 5+ times a week the last 6 years. Rain or shine. Sickness or health. Calm or wind.

She is at yoga now, while you are reading this, in case you are interested.

I reckon this Commitment thing is probably a slight form of mental illness, but try explaining that to her.

She is the same when it comes to vendors like dentists or hairdressers. In California, she remained with same tooth guy for 20 years, even though his office was far away and he overcharged. My Doc was closer and less expensive. Maybe it was because Dr. Rosen was Jewish and Dr. Chalk was a Mormon.

I might have that Rosen was doing a a little more than dentistry, if you know what I mean, except he looked like Art Garfunkel's ugly brother.

Don't get me started.....What's the deal here girls? You go to a person to get some excess hair removed from the head. Why should it cost a full day's pay for a simple service like this? What goes on in there? I believe it is a cut and color, no? But then there is the glass of wine, the intimate talk as if these people were some sort of psychiatrist. Is all that primping and pampering really worth 200 bucks?

I am always informed that the extra cost was due to "products".
Products, my ass!
Are all women playing this products game with their partners? Well, wise up, girls. We are on to you. The men are planning to have a meeting about this very soon. And we intend to do something about it too. Your days are numbered. And while we are on the subject, the abundance of bottles and cotton balls in the bathroom will also be on the agenda. A bathroom which we were all thrown out of right in the beginning, I might add.

I am very happy to walk into the nearest barber shop when I feel the need for a trim and some newsy conversation. The combs are in a jar of blue water. The chair is uncomfortable. I get a powdering of talcum at the end. For $10 I am out the door in 15 minutes and looking sharp. A barber could not sell you products if you begged him. But barbers don't like beggars. They will cut their throats during the shave. The rotting body will be sold to Clairol and made into "products".

'Nuff said.

Back to Kimberly's commitment issues. She recently read a book that was not very memorable. It is called "Eat Cake". The best part is that there are 10 marvelous recipes in the back.

Kimberly committed to bake them all.

I joined her in this promise. I agreed to let her bake 10 cakes. This would require additional pans and trays and ingredients. No problemo.

The first on was a pineapple/coconut layer cake. It took her 4 hours to prepare. Very moist and sweet. Almost too rich for me.

I said..Almost

After it was half eaten, I remembered to take a picture.

The second on was a Chocolate Espresso that weighed about 5 kilos. Unfuckingbelievable. It did not last long. I had it for breakfast, morning tea, noon tea, late afternoon tea, dinner, supper and evening tea and dessert.

Yesterday, she made a lemon layer cake. I love lemon. Kimberly was a little disappointed the way it turned out. Apparently, the lemon frosting was a little too much like custard rather than solid and rigid.

OH NO!!! The lemon topping is much like pudding.

Mrs. Emeril thought this was sort of unacceptable.

Well stand back, give me a liter of trim milk, pass me a fork, (in my right hand), and don't let the flying crumbs hit you in the face.

I can solve this problem with total commitment.

Afterwards, I intend to take a vigorous stroll to town to replenish the milk supply.

Maybe I'll drive.
I have to save energy so I can eat 7 more cakes.


At 3:58 AM, Anonymous robin said...

As always, priceless. I am surprised you even bothered to use utensils with that choc. one - fingers are faster and come to think of it, if you had gone the European way, you could have used forks in both hands and shovel even quicker! That one totally sounded like the winner! By the way, after reading this, Danny wants your job - golfing and eating cake sounds great to him! love robin

At 8:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some say, "life is about purpose". What that means is up to the individual but at the end of the "day" we look back and see how happy or content we are with the time we spent on this planet.
I'm happy that you occupy your time in ways that make you satisfied and even "have your cake and eat it too"!


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